Sometimes I am knocked down by an overwhelming rush of emotion `that takes my breath away. It usually hits me off guard, when I am doing mundane things like making a lunch, putting on shoes, or cleaning the counters. The thought that occurs to me seems outlandish because it's obvious, and it shouldn't be alarming. But, it always is: as a parent, I am 100% responsible for this tiny human being.
How am I qualified? I never took a course in being a mom. I took a course to learn how to play golf for goodness sake...how to drive a car, and how to swim. But, the motherhood course is on the job training. And, sometimes the fact that you are completely responsible for a little tiny life full of endless potential can make you feel unworthy of such a job. It's an enormous task with no consistent manual, yet many different opinions.
Being 100% responsible for another life is something that I don't think about on a consistent basis, because I'd be protecting him at every moment. I'd inevitably become the dreaded helicopter parent, just hovering over and making sure he was okay with every fall or disappointment. So, I'm glad it's only sometimes, on those rare occasions, when I am reminded on a conscience level of what an enormous responsibility we have as parents . . . and being the biggest task I've ever faced in life, how is there no preparation? I suppose it's all about the journey . . .
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